literature

Breaking Point

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It was a simple, peaceful night in the town of Izlude, one of the few lucky cities in the wartorn continent that was untouched by battles.  It was an out of the way place, lucky for those who lived there indeed. The young Delraiah was sitting on a simple wooden chair, gazing at the moonlit, star filled sky. Soon enough he felt a light tap on the shoulder, he turned around to see his dear kid sister Feena, looking at him. Just seeing her happy face always cheered him up and lifted his spirit, he gently patted her head, messing with her curly blue hair, extracting a cute giggle from her. "What's up Feena?" He asked with a smile? Feena simply put her arms to her back "It's time big brother! Don't forget what you promised this morning!"

Delraiah's expression changed rather sharply, remembering the fact that since he lost a game he played with her, he'd let her play with his hair tonight. He tried to play it off, but to no avail. He smiled sheepishly, stood up, and went over to the two stools that were set up by the fireplace. He sighed and sat down. "Dont make any crazy designs this time ok?" he eyed her jokingly. "Oh don't worry brother dear, your little sister has help this time." Delraiah, turned his gaze over to his left, from where the voice came from to see his older sister Marie entering the living room area, chair in hand. "Feena wanted to make your hair look very pretty today, so she asked me to help her out."

Delraiah looked at Marie's beautiful red hair, seeing how she took care of it, with its gorgeous braids and brilliant shine, he knew he'd be all right. He sat down on the first stool, Feena hopping onto the second stool and immediatly reaching for his hair, "Yay!" she said gleefully. she took her favorite hairbrush and immediatley started brushing his radiant silver hair. "Your hair is always so shiny and pretty!" She said with a giggle. Marie joined in with her own brush,  soon enough they had his long hair straightened. Then with Marie's guidance Feena started braiding his hair. Feena learned quickly, and soon enough Marie simply watched. Delraiah, was at ease, away from all the fighting going on between several factions in a continent ravaged by a five decade old war for the chance to take over and rule, He had been training for years, for he planned to find a way to stop all this fighting, and bring the continent, which had forgotten its own name, back to peace.

Finally after a little while longer, Marie and Feena finally finished with his hair, his hair was brushed straightit widened and then all cam together to form a braided ponytail. "We made something for you the other day Del." Feena said shyly. "Oh? What's that?" Delraiah asked. Marie smiled and produced two aquatic blue ribbons, which led Feena to blush a bit. "This is why she wanted to make your hair. It was her idea for a birthday present." Marie said happily, kissing his forehead lightly. "Happy birthday, brother."  Feena quickly took one of the ribbons, and both sisters tied thier ribbons onto his hair. Marie's ribbon went just above where his hair widened, Feena's went at the end of the braid.

"All finished! Happy birthday Del!" Feena said with joy as she jumped onto his back, hugging him, Marie watched and smiled, her hands clasped together happily as uncontainable tears of joy escaped the now 19 year old Delraiah's eyes. "Thank you, sisters, I couldn't have asked for anything sweeter." It was the end of what should have been one of the happiest days of his life.


Unfortunatly, it wasnt meant to be...


Later that night as Delraiah was putting Feena to sleep, he heard a scream from downstairs. he turned quickly, Feena showing obvious fright. No doubt about it, something happened to Marie. They ran down the stairs to find the living room ablaze, and his sister on her knees, blood escaping her body from her stomach and mouth, her life escaping her as a large man held her by the hair. Delraiah could tell from the man's war paint and red bandanas, not to mention the maniacal laughter, that he was in fact part of the maniacal Berserkers facton. The brute stabbed Marie again, gutting her with his sword, silencing her. He pulled out his sword slowly, and  Marie's now lifeless body slumped to the ground. "No!" Delraiah screamed, rushing the brute. A sword swipe was all he got for his troubles. Delraiah's eyes widened in disbelief as he felt and saw his own blood leave his body, falling harshly on his back in obvious pain. "Brother!" Feena cried, desperatly running towards her fallen brother "G-go away... you monster!" she cried at the large brute, waving her tiny arm at him as if to dispel him away, who simply laughed and picked the little girl up by her neck, and lifted Delraiah by his bloody shirt. he snickered as he saw Delraiah's expression as he choked the life out of Feena "Watch as your sisters leave you, and be prepared to join them as well! This city, just like all others shall be ravaged by the Berserkers! Chaos alone shall remain the ruler of this land!" With that he tossed Delraiah aside towards Marie's chair, breaking it. Groggy, and losing blood, his willpower was all that allowed Delraiah to stand... but only to watch him snap Feena's neck like a twig.... with glazed eyes the last thing Feena would ever see was her brother, as his sanity snapped.

The Berserker laughed tossing Feena's body towards Marie's. Delraiah's eyes went bloodshot, as he stood off balance, his breathing totally eratic, blood continuing to spill freely onto the floor from the large gash that now decorated his body. "Your death will be a painful one boy!" Delraiah's mind thought back, a memory flashing through his mind as the brute charged at him:

"What will you do when you grow up Del?" Feena asked him. "I'll stop this war someday" He said proudly. "And how will you do that? Marie asked "...I dont know. But I'll do whatever I have to do, by myself if I have to!"

His blue eyes regained focus, rage the only thing present in them. The boy let out a blood curling scream as he grabbed the brute's blade mid-swing, blood weeping from his hands. Delraiah kicked the Berserker in the crotch, an effective a disarm as any. The young man grabbed the sword, it's weight proving too much for him, bringing the majority of it down to the ground, Delraiah grunted heavily, swinging the sword upwards a crude yet effective upwards slash vertically on the brute's face, directing his gaze upwards at Delraiah. Fear grasped the Berserker as he saw the end: The image of Olren, the God of Vengance. With his black feathered wings in a majestic full spread gripping the sword in tandem with the enraged Delraiah, sharing the boy's pain, sharing the boy's sorrow, and helping the way he did best by lending the boy his strength and striking downward in one mighty chop, slicing the Berserker clean in half, with such force that  massive burst of blood spread across the room.

"I grant you the beggining of your vengance..."

He didnt even think twice of what he had just accomplished, letting go of the sword, Delraiah walked weakly to his sisters, carrying them both out of the burning house, upon getting clear, he looked around him, all of Izlude was ablaze, dead bodies where everywhere, the Berserkers had destroyed the town... completley. What little strength remained finally left him, the bodies of his sisters slipping from his weakened arms, and he passed out...welcoming death.

Morning came, and Delraiah awoke, the large gash across his chest had somehow recovered, a massive scar in it's place. He stood to see his hometown completley in shambles. He would later find the bodies of his mother and father as well as the rest of the townsfolk, he knew what to do... Through the course of the day he buried all the bodies, tears rolling down his cheeks, as the tears rolled his sorrow was replaced with anger. Night came and only the bodies of his family remained. he was there on his knees unable to cry any longer, watching thier bodies, his face emotionless. He buried thier bodies, and went back to his charred house to see if anything survived the blaze, surely enough only 5 small scarfs resembling small capes remained, one was on a stick the others in a drawer, he saw the cleaved body of the brute, he did not know that Olren, God of Vengance helped him last night, he grabbed a bandana and the faction's emblem from the corpse, he needed it for what he planned to do. He placed the stick on the ground, using one of the small scarf as a flag of sorts where his family was buried. The other four he kept. He went around town and gathered what he could, he found a backpack, and filled it with whatever supplies he could find. He took the armor from one of the small town's few gaurd shacks a short sword, and a buckler.

He went back to his family's grave. He fell to his knees, sorrow overcoming him, and looked at the scarf. Images of his family in his head. He closed his eyes, and spoke quietly. "I told you all I'd bring peace to this country, even if I had to do it alone." He opened his eyes, now full of resolve..."And now....I'm all alone, robbed of my family by a group of inhumane bastards! That my fate be a quick death or that I actually bring this place to peace I'll soon see,but through it all I ask that you watch over me..."

He stood, and gave the scarf on last look, then passed his hand over the two ribbons his sisters gave him. He turned his back and walked off into the night, leaving Izlude behind, he stopped and looked back only once, for now he could not wallow in misery at the past, he could only go forward, he walked onward, gripping a scarf, a single tear streaming down his face, the last tear he'd shed for years to come.


His home was destroyed, his family murdered, his life shattered. All that remained was an unquenchable fire of rage. Vengance would soon be his, and nothing in this, or any world would stop him from attaining it...
It came across my mind to put in what makes my lead bad guy snap. this is what I have planned for now, I might change this later. I've been taking an intrest in writing as of late...even if I'm not that great at it.

I personally never thought I could write something like this.

<edit> Fixed some typos changed a few things.I think its better now...add mature content thingy since its violent and stuff ^^;

<edit 2> Fixed ALL typos, I'm fully satisfied now, removed the mature mark, if ya cant handle a bit of violence, why read fantasy stuff?

<edit 3> more typo fixes, changed a few things to make it more descriptive.

ENJOY!!(please?)
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GladysClump's avatar
Since you've said in comments that you've taken an interest in writing, you should stick with it, I think you have some really good ideas for story telling, and just need to work a bit on the technical stuff. The creative aspect of it tho is what's most important as I've read plenty of technically correct stuff that was really boring.